10 tips to calm down when you’re about to lose your cool

Everyone loses it sometimes – perhaps the kids aren’t listening or your father is bossy, your co-worker didn’t inform you that they were taking a week off so you had to cover for them, your boss yelled at you for being late or your best friend gossiped about you to your girlfriend. It is normal to feel stressed and ready to snap at someone but losing your cool won’t fix anything and the way you handle such situations could make or break the sale.

In an interview with HT Lifestyle, Dr Malini Saba, Psychologist, Founder and Chairman of Anannke Foundation, revealed five simple psychology-backed techniques for regaining control:

1-Ground yourself:

Using all five senses to centre is one of the most effective strategies to restore inner peace. Begin this technique by sitting comfortably on a chair and taking 2-3 deep breaths. Observe your environment and engage your five senses.

Five things can be seen; four can be felt; three can be heard; two can be smelled; and one can be tasted.

2-Meditation:

Meditation is a good way to learn to depersonalise thoughts and detach from the source of anger. Observing thoughts objectively, deciphering what they are trying to tell us, and recognising the underlying emotion develops mindfulness. One can also practise “guided meditation” on the internet.

3-Self-validation of your feelings:

When people feel misunderstood, they yell. Validate your own feelings and views, even if no one else does. Replace stressful thoughts with more realistic ones, such as, “This moment is difficult, but I’ll get through it.” Tell yourself why those notions are false and be your own cheerleader.

4-Muscle relaxation:

When you are on the verge of losing your cool, your body is holding on to a lot of energy. Physical activity is an efficient and healthy way to expend excess energy. Perform some jumping jacks, stretch, take a brief walk around the block, swim, or play your favourite sport, etc. Physically releasing tension helps avert emotional explosions in the present. Endorphins and other stress-relieving hormones are released during exercise, which enhances mood.

5-Laugh

Maintain a list of TV shows, comedy specials, and other resources that you may turn to when you need a good chuckle to lift your spirits. It can be an emotionally transformative event.

Dr Anuneet Sabharwal, MBBS, MD, Psychiatrist, Founder and Director of The Happy Tree Hospital, revealed five scientifically supported strategies for dealing with your emotions before you lose your cool:

1-Small self-care:

When we’re in a terrible mood, it’s easy to forget about you, the most important person. We may lack the strength or see little benefit in pursuing tiny things on our own behalf. Try spending some time at a spa or salon, dining at your favourite restaurant, or going shopping. These are some ways you can use to detach yourself from the circumstance and approach the problem with an open mind. You will feel more accomplished even if you aren’t 100 percent better.

2-Journaling:

Journaling involves analysing your emotions in a journal or notebook. The practise of journaling benefits the treatment of anxiety, stress, and depression. Journaling about your deepest thoughts and emotions improves mental, emotional, and physical health.

3-Reduce stimuli:

Especially in highly sensitive individuals, over stimulation might induce panic attacks. Take measures to decrease your environmental impact. Turn off the radio and ringer on your mobile device. Turn off the lights, fans, and windows. Take a few moments to focus on your body and take several deep breaths.

4: Rational thinking:

This strategy involves providing explanations for your anxious thoughts. Stress makes it more difficult to focus on the rational or positive aspects of a situation. So, you need to use logic in your thinking to figure out what the real problem is and how to solve it.

5-Counselling:

The oldest, easiest, and most efficient way to settle oneself down is to discuss your worries with another person. If you don’t feel like talking to anyone in your social circle, you can always visit a professional.