Internet backs woman who doesn’t want her boyfriend’s name on the house they’re buying

A woman has taken to Reddit’s “Am I the A**hole” forum after getting in a fight with her boyfriend over a major life decision: buying a house together.

The post, shared on Thursday, has gone viral on the platform, racking up over 8,600 upvotes and 2,100 comments at the time of writing.

Buying a home as an unmarried couple can be slightly more complicated than for their married counterparts. Specifically, a couple has to decide how their homeownership will work: Will one person hold the title as the property’s sole owner? Or will both parties hold equal ownership?

According to NOLA, there are “risks” involved with putting a jointly-owned property under one person’s name. However, under certain circumstances, it may be the more practical option.

“Sometimes, a couple that jointly owns a house is tempted to put only one name on the deed to save on taxes [or] avoid creditors,” explained the online legal resource. “Or, if one person’s credit is terrible, it may seem like a good idea not to mention his or her interest in the property in order to get a loan to buy the house.”

The Redditor, known as u/Best-Preparation4784, appears to be dealing with the latter situation. According to her post, the 22-year-old has been dating her boyfriend, aged 25, for four years. And while she has found herself in a secure place financially, her boyfriend has faced some struggles.

She explained: “My [boyfriend] … doesn’t have a very good work ethic and has had about [eight] different jobs in the [four] years we have been together, all making minimum wage.”

However, when she “brought up getting a house … he was totally on board with it.”

“I have enough in my savings for a down payment and to cover all the closing [costs] but my boyfriend doesn’t have any [savings] and lives paycheck to paycheck,” she said. “When we were looking for a house we kept the price range small enough to where I could pay for it alone so we could use his [earnings] as extra cash.”

Going forward, they “agreed to split the mortgage 50/50,” and that she would cover the cost of utilities.

“We finally found our dream house and are going to be signing the papers in a couple of weeks. I mentioned to him that I would like to be the only name on the home since we are buying it with my savings and we aren’t married and don’t plan to be married anytime soon,” explained the Redditor.

This decision has left the boyfriend angry. “He is now upset with me about it [because] it’s supposed to be ‘our house,'” she wrote. “I’ve told him that it is OUR house but legally it will just [be] mine [because] I don’t want to put $400k on the line.”

In response, “he said that if it’s just going to be [her] house that he shouldn’t have to pay to live there.”

“I disagree, it would be like paying rent anywhere else and when/if we get married we will change the agreement,” concluded the Redditor. “He hasn’t talked to me for [three] days now and I really don’t think I’m in the wrong here.”

In the comments section, readers were quick to back the woman’s decision, regardless of how it made her boyfriend feel.

“Do NOT put his name on the paperwork,” wrote u/ollygollymolly in a blunt but highly-voted comment.

“He doesn’t put any money in, so he doesn’t get ownership,” echoed u/likeahike. “Stand your ground on this and protect yourself.”

Others felt that the Redditor should’ve had these discussions with her boyfriend earlier in the home-buying process. “This is a conversation y’all should have started long before actually looking for houses,” said u/Nothing_Rhymed. “You went in expecting to buy a house solo, he went in expecting you two to buy a house together. Neither of you clearly communicated this to the other until it was too late.”

While most agreed that the Redditor shouldn’t put her boyfriend’s name on the house, some objected to the idea that the boyfriend should pay 50 percent of their mortgage. “It’s not like paying rent anywhere else,” noted u/PsychologicalBelt316. “The dynamic changes when you two are in a relationship together. It is him assisting you in paying down your mortgage so you’re seeing a net benefit while he’s seeing a net loss.”

Newsweek has reached out to u/Best-Preparation4784 for additional comment.