Alexandra Billings on Responding to Anti-Trans Comedy and Politics: “Our Celebration of Who We Are Is the Best Revenge”

I watched the Dave Chappelle special — by accident. I don’t think he’s the funniest person in the world, but I do think he had, at one point, some really interesting political points to make through his comedy. I watched it completely unaware of how far he would go. I haven’t watched the Ricky Gervais special. Look, if I want to get triggered, there’s a million places I can go to do that. Why would I put myself in that position?

With both of these men, we, the LGBTQ community, live in their heads rent-free. They constantly talk about us. They constantly make jokes about us. These men are obsessed with the trans community. So how do we combat comedians who are obsessed with who we are and where we come from? We don’t have to laugh at their jokes. We don’t have to buy tickets to their shows. We don’t have to turn on the TV when they’re on. Turn your TV to another of the five million channels. Go to Hulu for Christ’s sakes.

My best advice is to bombard them with joy and power and freedom and jubilation and celebration. For me, it’s about slathering them with queerness in a way that makes them feel like they just got run over by a great big queer bus. Every freaking minute, I want to shove the LGBTQIA+ community down their throats with great love and great joy. That’s my weapon. Our celebration of who we are is the best revenge.

The truth is that people who attack us are terrified. They’re absolutely terrified. They’re terrified of newness. They’re terrified of possibility. Anything that remotely smells of change is absolutely terrifying. Remember, we’re talking about men. We’re talking about men and their loss of power and this fear that anything that diverts from the straight and narrow needs to be parodied and made fun of.

I’m 60-years-old and I began my transition in 1979. At that time, it was illegal for me to walk down the street — there was an indecency act — and it was legal to be beaten there. That’s where we’re headed again. These laws are being enacted in states in our country right now where any trans human under the age of 18 cannot receive any kind of health care. They’re even talking about removing those people from their families.

We’ve already gone backward. What we have to do now is continue to educate. And by education, what I mean is visibility — if you’re able and in a safe place. Visibility and information is important because these people do not let up.

This amazing thing happened to me when I was in Wicked on Broadway. I came out to the stage door and there was this little girl. She was maybe seven years old — an African American girl with beautiful jet-black hair pulled up with a little crown on her head and fairy wings. Her mother told me, “She’s my daughter and she’s trans and she’s never seen another trans person older than maybe 21-years-old in person ever.”

I said I want you to listen to me. I want you to see me really clearly right now. Because it’s really important that you know that I’m old enough to be your grandmother. What matters most is that you can grow up to be this age. Forget that I’m an actress. Forget everything that I do. Because that’s not what I am. This is what I am. We can look into each other’s eyes. I see my past and you can see your future.

That moment, which will live in me until the day I leave this planet, would never have happened 20 years ago. So the door that’s open right now is a miracle. I never thought I’d live to see it.

So what are you doing every single day to lift up yourself and others? How are you of service? That’s what we need. Because we have already gone backward. Now we need to figure out how to get ourselves moving forward because we’re stuck and we need to get unstuck. Now.

Alexandra Billings (Transparent, The Conners) is the author of a new memoir, This Time for Me.

This story first appeared in the June 8 issue of The Hollywood Reporter magazine. Click here to subscribe.