Ask Amy: How blunt should I be about my secret crush?

Dear Amy: About four days a week, I hang at a wonderful local coffee spot. I bring my laptop and have my regular spot.

There is one worker, “Clara,” I’ve developed a crush on. She’s … well, a ray of sunshine.

I’d like to express my interest in her, but I have two issues: I’m a woman (I don’t know if she’s into women), and I don’t know anything about her own dating status.

I don’t want to mess up my morning routine by overstepping, but I’m wondering if I should do more to express my interest in her, other than smile, chit-chat and leave a 20 percent tip?

Going to Decaf

Dear Decaf: Clara might be receiving multiple expressions of interest from multiple sources each day. Servers sometimes report that customer come-ons are a significant problem.

Clara has frequent exposure to you. She should be the first to express interest. She can do this in a number of ways, including the now-cliché expression of writing her number or handle on the outside of your coffee cup or on your receipt.

In the meantime, enjoy the daily dose of sunshine, without getting burned.

Dear Amy: Do people report to you that the COVID pandemic changed them?

It changed me.

I thought the isolation wouldn’t bother me because I am an introverted woman. I treasure my solitude.

There were times when I didn’t see another human being for a week or 10 days. I went only to the store and the library just to see another human being and chat for a minute or two. That seemed to suffice. After all, that person walking toward me might be carrying a disease that could kill me.

I remember thinking it’s as though I am in a spaceship that keeps circling the Earth, and I can’t land.

Well, now I have landed, and I find that I am less tolerant than I used to be, and a lot more cynical. My compassion for others has descended to a new low.

I have dropped a couple of long-term friendships because I couldn’t bear the other person’s neediness. It was as if I was for years wearing rose-colored glasses, and they fell off and now I see the world differently.