Behaviours that are not okay in any relationship

Some behaviour patterns are unhealthy for any kind of relationship. Be it in family or friendship or in a romantic relationship, some behaviours can be extremely toxic anywhere. “If you’re someone who has a history of difficult relationships, you may have learned to cope by developing patterns that do not honor who you are in order to maintain the peace (or to not be alone). This can look like people-pleasing, avoiding bringing up tough issues, changing who you are, or tolerating behaviors that you absolutely should not be,” wrote Therapist Sadaf Siddiqi. The expert further noted down a few behaviour patterns that are not acceptable in any relationship:

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Holding grudges and allowing them to build: When we hold grudges against someone and do not address it in a healthy way, it starts to build into resentment. This can further lead to feelings of anxiety and depression. It is important to process emotions of grudges and find ways to address them.

Changing your core values to be loved more: We all have our own sets of core values, beliefs and ethics. When we start to model them depending on the love and acceptance we receive based on the beliefs, it can mean that we are giving up our uniqueness and perspectives for the other person. That is a major red flag.

Refusing to discuss the difficult stuff: Brushing difficult things under the rug can have a deep negative impact on the relationship. The difficult conversations need to be made no matter what – we should find time and space to have such conversations.

Neglecting your needs to keep the peace: We should keep our needs and wants as a priority – when we start to neglect that, we become people pleasers. This can cause frustration and resentment in the relationship.

Abuse: Abuse of any kind – be it financial, or physical or mental or sexual – is not acceptable in any relationship.