Compliment slips: how to find flattering underwear

So often the difficulty of getting dressed lies in the clothes no one is going to see. The wrong underwear can make a pig’s ear of a perfect party dress or a beautifully cut pair of trousers. Too many times I have had to ditch what I was about to wear because I couldn’t locate a pair of knickers that didn’t visibly cleft my buttocks in twain or because I realised I still hadn’t got around to buying the slip that would make a sheer dress a more respectable option for a work dinner.

Good foundation garments are like essential ingredients, working hard in the mix but blended in so well you can’t make them out: the bra that doesn’t destroy the line of a beautiful silk top, a bodysuit that helps a dress or jumpsuit hang more gracefully. Shapewear and control underwear are part of it, but this isn’t about suctioning in body parts to make yourself look “thin”. We are now supposedly more accepting of a wider variety of body shapes.

“Curves and folds being visible seem far more acceptable these days,” says fashion stylist Kate Rose Morris. She says the majority of her clients want to “smooth” rather than “shrink”. And that’s certainly my take. I prefer to think of good underwear as garment enhancement rather than body enhancement.

Personal stylist Therese Bassler has helpful suggestions at the ready for clients seeking the right undergarments. “When wearing delicate fabrics such as silk or figure-hugging clothes, including jeans, make sure that you have seamless underwear,” she says. She recommends the Butter micro modal briefs from American brand Commando (£30, matchesfashion.com) also one of my favourites, along with Sloggi’s Zero Feel briefs (£9 on sale, uk.sloggi.com). “Go up at least one size if you want to avoid VPL,” she advises.

“A padded or even slightly moulded bra will show through a fine fabric, so opt for a seamless one, possibly in a microfibre,” Bassler says. I wear Commando’s Minimalist stretch soft-cup bra every day (£70, net-a-porter.com) but want a little more structure under shirts and blouses. She recommends Bodas’ Tactel underwire bra (£45, bodaslondon.com). “Their bras work well under shirts/tops without showing. They also produce perfect-fitting bras in cotton, which is hard to find. They go up to 38E.” For more plunging necklines she recommends Eres’ Sculpt triangle bra (£245, net-a-porter.com).

A friend of mine smooths out the lines of lacy, padded or underwired bras by wearing one of Hanro’s super-soft Touch Feeling micro polyamide crop tops over the top (£48, hanro.co.uk). I tried this tactic and it works. Hanro is an all-round great brand to have in the underwear drawer. (In the new book Modern Manners, a selection of essays and advice from The Gentlewoman, the magazine’s editor-in-chief Penny Martin reveals that she gives the brand’s vests as thank you presents.)

When I was growing up my mum used to insist my sister and I always wear a “petticoat” with skirts and dresses, and I still feel slightly untethered without a slip. They haven’t always been that easy to come by, a retail oversight when so many dresses are manufactured without lining. Ideally, one needs a selection box of different lengths and colours — definitely black, white and a colour that matches your skin tone. Marks and Spencer’s Cool Comfort polyamide slip (£20, marksandspencer.com) comes in seven shades and up to seven lengths. I also like Hanro’s Satin Deluxe bodydress (£76, hanro.co.uk) and Commando’s strapless Two-faced Tech Control stretch slip is useful for a smooth line under fitted dresses (£69 on sale, net-a-porter.com).

I still feel baffled and slightly frightened by some of the items on offer in deep shapewear or “control” underwear territory. Those glutinously thick body suits with no gusset fastenings induce panic attacks on sight. And I don’t really see the point of the thigh-length control knickers, which seem to simply shift bulges of flesh to less expected regions of the body.

Nevertheless, around party season, the bodysuits from Spanx’s Suit Your Fancy, OnCore and Thinstincts 2.0 (ach, that name!) are all bestsellers. I wore the Suit Your Fancy high-rise control thong (£58, Selfridges.com) under a vegan leather Nanushka dress to a pre-Christmas party and was grateful for its support, if not the increased time wrangling in the bathroom. If my tummy looked un-feminist, I’ll let other people be the judge.

As a diehard anti-Kardashian, it was with some cynicism that I road-tested pieces from Kim Kardashian’s Skims shapewear label later that week. My prejudice seemed confirmed when a selection of teensy bodysuits arrived. The Sculpting V-neck stretch-woven body (£66, selfridges.com) looked like swimwear for toddlers.

Given that I have a long back, I thought there was no chance of even getting into it, but I was wrong. The stretch in these pieces is quite something and they’re comfortable, lightweight and un-sweaty (suddenly the brand’s $1.6bn valuation makes sense). Also impressive: the depth of range goes from a UK size 2 to size 28-30. I wore one to a party under a long velvet wrap dress that has a tendency to unwrap at the wrong moment and for once felt secure. The bodysuit has now earned a permanent place in the armoury. One more invisible friend.

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