DEAR HARRIETTE: I had a falling-out with someone I was close with for years. We parted ways almost a year ago, but it almost makes me a little sad to admit that my life has been more peaceful without them.
They seem to still be angry with me, though, and it’s obvious. I feel sorry for them. I’m so over the situation, and they are still so upset about it. What should I do?
Over It
DEAR OVER IT: Let it be. Stop checking to see what this person is grumbling about, and live your life. Your parting of ways clearly was the best thing for you. You may simply need to accept that things are better now without seeking resolution for your former friend.
To ease your mind, review your relationship. What prompted your separation? What did you do that may have been hurtful? Is there anything for which you should apologize? If so, you may want to reach out to this person to say that you are sorry for whatever you did to hurt them, but proceed with caution. It may be better just to let it be.
Over time, this person may be able to release the bitterness. Since you now feel free, enjoy that and live your life.
DEAR HARRIETTE: Lately, I’ve been finding myself with a lot of free time during the day.
I work remotely, but the company that I work for is in a completely different time zone than me.
My workday begins before everyone else’s, but it also ends before everyone else’s. I want to fight the fatigue that working in a different time zone gives me and make the absolute most of my day. How can I ensure my productivity when I have free time?
Free Time
DEAR FREE TIME: Thanks to the various quarantines of the pandemic, thousands of people now work remotely. On one hand, it can be great. It allows people like you to work for companies in other time zones. On the other, it can disrupt one’s rhythm, sleep pattern and daily schedule.
What you need to do is create a plan for your life and then implement it.
Step back for a moment and consider what you want for yourself. What are your short-term and long-term goals? What do you like about your job? What can you do to improve your circumstances there? What more do you want in life?
Evaluate your self-care regimen, if you have one. How often do you exercise? What and when do you eat? What are your extracurricular interests? How often do you engage in the things that you value outside of work?
Once you have identified what you care about, begin to add some of those activities into your weekly routine. For example, add some form of exercise to your day. Schedule time once a week or month to visit with friends. Select a long-term project to tackle, and write it into your calendar so that you work on it daily and make it happen.
By writing your goals on a calendar, you will create a better opportunity to implement them. Track your activity and see if you become more mindful of your time.
Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to [email protected] or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.
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