DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a 24-year-old man, and I bought a trailer home about a year ago.
I like that I am a homeowner, but the anxiety that comes with being one is consuming me every day. I work in construction, and I go home every day on my lunch break to ensure that nothing is wrong with it. I wake up with my heart racing, scared that something will go wrong with the electricity or plumbing — or that I might even get robbed.
I want the liberty of being a homeowner and having property to call my own, but I don’t know how much longer I will be able to live like this.
People have been suggesting selling the home and renting an apartment because, though there will always be maintenance costs and repairs, in a rental those would not fall on me. I, however, like my privacy and peace, which is why I like living further out in the country in my mobile home.
What do you suggest I do?
Stay or Sell
DEAR STAY OR SELL: Calm down.
Yes, it is a big deal to buy a home, but don’t give up. You can figure it out. Start with where you are parking it. Is the trailer park safe? How are other homeowners managing there? Figure out if your concerns are valid, or if you are overly worried.
If the neighborhood is questionable, move. That’s the great thing about a mobile home — you can drive to another location.
Insure your home fully so that if something does happen, you are covered. Install a security system that will track any movement surrounding or within your home. Then do your best to enjoy your life.
It may take some time to get used to the responsibility of owning your first home, but you can do it.
DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a cabin where I spend a lot of time in the summer. My friends from college called and asked if they could come spend a week with me.
I agreed, with the contingency that they be self-sufficient, meaning they bring their own food and cook it, stay tidy, etc.
I intend to work on my art, and I don’t have time or money to play hostess. Do you think this will work?
On Your Own
DEAR ON YOUR OWN: Think about your friends. Are they independent and responsible? Are they neat? They need to be prepared to fend for themselves and respect your space.
If you believe that this group has that capability and you have been crystal clear with them about your expectations, you can extend the invitation. Be sure to tell them when you can spend time with them, whether you intend to share any meals with them and any other specifics about being in your home that you feel they should know.
Since they did tell you they want to spend time with you, you must figure out how to manage that. Carve out time each day that you can devote to them so that they don’t feel like they are in a hotel. You will have to host a little bit. If you can’t, this is not the right time for them to come.
Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to [email protected] or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.
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