“No, I don’t wash the towel, the towel washes me. Who washes a towel?”
I think everyone in the world, from babies to oldies, would agree that New Girl is bonkers funny. So, naturally, here are the funniest moments from every season of New Girl.*
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*I will say that after finishing this article — apart from the intro you’re reading right now — I know I am missing so many of the funniest moments, from the popcorn machine to The Pepperwood Chronicles. However, for my own sake, I must stop working on this.
1.
The loft mousetrap.
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2.
The lives of Schmidt’s other friends.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
3.
Jess’s type.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
4.
Nick’s inability to be normal around Russell.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
5.
Youths.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
6.
When Schmidt has to put money in the douchebag jar because of this.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
7.
When Jess says an A+ insult to Nick after he inadvertently messes up her day with her boyfriend’s daughter.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
8.
The reason Nick doesn’t wash a towel.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
9.
Cymbals are part of the drum kit.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
10.
The fact that the song that gets Nick pumped is “Cotton Eye Joe.”
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
11.
Schmidt’s declaration at his “re-branding event” (party), which he throws to celebrate his penis no longer being broken.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
12.
Nick’s cookie meltdown.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
13.
Jess’s effort to comfort Cece when Cece is freaking out about how she’s never seen her fiancé’s genitals.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
14.
The Julius Pepperwood disguise.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
15.
The 10-minute joke about squirrels.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
16.
The names of Nick’s testicles.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
17.
Jess’s response when Nick calls her a gold digger.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
18.
What Nick thinks is sexy.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
19.
When Winston is attempting to complete a puzzle and he asks Schmidt what he thinks it will look like.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
20.
When Cece brings over some Chinese food.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
21.
What Nick forgot how to do.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
22.
When everyone in the loft is having a weird and rough few days, so Winston gives them a talking to.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
23.
When Jess violates Nick’s privacy, so Nick goes through all the stuff in her room.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
24.
It was a Thursday.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
25.
Everything about Nick’s sauce.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
26.
Winston rolling off the couch while he’s sore from police academy.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
27.
This specific reveal about Nick’s childhood.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
28.
Cece’s flawless diss.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
29.
Schmidt’s reaction to a spider in the loft.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
At one point, he also says, “There it is, it’s right there. It’s licking its lips.”
30.
The way a panicking Nick asks someone if they want a grape.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
31.
The jerk Jess goes on a date with.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
32.
Winston’s pickup line.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
33.
What makes Schmidt angry and scared at the same time.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
34.
Prank Sinatra’s CV.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
35.
The yardstick.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
36.
Winston is sitting closer than Nick.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
37.
The cherries.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
38.
The love scene in the novel Fred Armisen’s character is writing.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
39.
Bridgette Wilson-Sampras.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
40.
Jeans is pants.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
41.
The mashed potatoes.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
42.
Robby’s need to get away from Winston.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
43.
When Cece and Schmidt try to have a nice first night in their new house after reading about the neighborhood’s crime rates, but then they hear a noise.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
44.
Nick’s cooking skills.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
45.
Schmidt and Jess’s conversation about her date with Robby.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
46.
When Reagan arrives in the loft after Nick doesn’t pick her up from the airport.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
47.
Where Schmidt blows off steam.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
48.
The beginning of the bonding conversation between Nick and Cece and Schmidt’s contractor.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
49.
Schmidt’s reaction to hearing about a break-in at his daughter’s preschool.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
50.
When Nick and Winston have a Chicago moment.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
51.
The old man.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
52.
When Cece sees Jess in her wedding dress on her wedding day for the first time, not knowing Jess is very high.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox TelevisionElizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
53.
Foot lotion hand.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
54.
When Cece and Schmidt’s daughter is trying out for a fancy school and he’s worried.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
55.
And when Winston attempts to leave the loft.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
56.
But he actually does have to go.
Elizabeth Meriwether Pictures / 20th Century Fox Television
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