How important are references for landing a job?

Q. I’m interviewing for a job and they asked for three references. Will they actually reach out to them? I didn’t leave my last job on such great terms and I don’t really have any bosses to put down prior to this last job either. What should I do?

A. First, congrats they’ve asked for references! This means you’re a serious candidate and in contention for the job. Many companies do speak to references and since they’re asking, they’re probably planning on reaching out. Whether they do or not is out of your control, but what is in your control is providing them with three meaningful contacts who will have your back.

Ideally, they’ll want to reach out to a former boss, but references go further than that. When I worked in recruiting, it wasn’t uncommon to see candidates include former peers, clients, vendors and more. Think about people you’ve perhaps worked with in the past couple of years who you indirectly reported to (maybe it was a special project) or alongside as peers. Think also about clients and essentially people you stay in touch with today with whom you no longer work.

If your list is a little short, let’s say with two names, that’s OK. Think of others in your community, perhaps volunteer initiatives, etc. Reach out to them first and ask if they’ll vouch for you; indicate the job you’re pursuing and the company that might call them. Then get specific in terms of what skills you’d like them to highlight such as time and project management. Then, add them to the list and provide it to the employer.

This is why it’s so important to keep in touch with various contacts, from former bosses to colleagues, clients and vendors. Relationships are so important to maintain, so while your initial question was about former bosses, think of references as a springboard to staying in touch. You can offer to be their references, too.

Q. I’m an introvert and do not like parties. My company is having a big one this year, the first in-person gathering in a few years. Then our department is having a luncheon. My smaller team is having one, too. Do I have to participate? They’re so painful.

A. Yes to both, it does end and you should participate.

Here’s why you should go: It matters. If you don’t go, you’d be one of the few people noticeably absent. You don’t have to stay the whole time. Pro tip: Show up to the party when it starts and greet the executives, put in face time with your boss, and also, get the food while it’s hot!  Say hi to your work family, then simply politely excuse yourself within the hour. You don’t even have to give a reason, just say it’s been nice seeing them, you need to leave, have a nice evening. Just because you attend doesn’t mean you have to be the last one standing.

Regarding luncheons, there’s really no way out of them since they’ll be during work hours. Again, even though it’s not your jam, look at it as relationship building, another way to get to know your colleagues.

Vicki Salemi is a career expert, former corporate recruiter, author, consultant, speaker, and career coach./Tribune News Service