The feeling of falling in love hopelessly is all too familiar. From racing hearts to sweaty palms, the chemicals associated with reward centre of our brain are produced in abundance. At the initial stages, when your relationship is new, levels of dopamine, a type of neurotransmitter go up and one feel pleasure and euphoria, similar to that associated with the use of cocaine or alcohol. However, this stage is temporary and with time couples lose that feeling of pleasure and excitement associated with a new relationship. However, it is possible to revive this feeling through dopamine dating, says a relationship expert. (Also read: 8 signs your partner is emotionally abusing you)
Dopamine dating, the new dating term, encourages people to explore and maintain the highs and excitement usually experienced at the start of a relationship, as the relationship progresses. It is about taking the time and effort to find interesting and creative ways to keep your dopamine high through various stages in a relationship.
Shahzeen Shivdasani, Relationship Expert, Bumble shares tips to retain excitement in a relationship through various stages.
When the honeymoon period has just ended
Maintaining individuality: It is very easy to get swept up in the romance of a new relationship. However, maintaining your individuality is what keeps a relationship exhilarating. Make time for your hobbies, friends and family. When you go out and do things without each other you will have more to share thus stimulating your mental and emotional intimacy levels.
Playful witty banter: Be playful. Witty banter keeps your conversations interesting. While we might actively do this in the initial few months of dating, sometimes it tends to decrease once a commitment is made. This is a powerful tool to keep the excitement alive.
Beyond two years: How to fall in love everyday
Don’t take each other for granted: Take the time to show gratitude and appreciate your partner. You can do this by remembering to thank your partner when they do something for you, even if that’s just helping you with groceries. Taking note of even the smallest things matter, being affectionate and reminding them how much you love them.
Don’t be afraid to go slow: If you want that new relationship energy to last, don’t be in a hurry to settle into a routine. Surprise your partner with love notes, small gestures, or by planning an impromptu date or a game/movie night. So don’t be afraid to go slow. If it’s meant to last, you don’t need to rush into things right away. Surprises can keep mystery alive.
Prioritise intimacy: Emotional, intellectual and physical intimacy will always remain an important part of any relationship. After dating someone for two or more years, some of this may start to take a back seat. Ensure that you and your partner have genuine and clear conversations around your intimacy needs and desires.
When you are engaged or in a live-in
Take time off together: Excitement of having things to look forward to can be a dopamine-booster. When you have been with someone for a long time, you get into the routine of things, and sometimes, that can feel monotonous. Taking a break from your regular life and exploring a new place together can bring a sense of adventure.
Keep doing new things together: Trying new things together that you haven’t done before can boost intimacy and bring thrill back to the relationship.
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