Hum of Lord’s library fails to lift England

As England probed for an opening under leaden skies in mid-afternoon on the third day of the second Test the Lord’s crowd stirred from its post-lunch reverie.

The famous ‘hum’ became a buzz as home supporters urged Stuart Broad on to break Australia’s first-wicket stand.

Soon, however, the hum was back, only sporadically interrupted by roars as Josh Tongue finally penetrated David Warner’s obdurate defence, then, much later, Marnus Labuschagne holed out to point.

In going from Edgbaston, with its raucous Hollies Stand, to Lord’s, this Ashes series has gone through the two extremes of English Test-cricket atmospherics.

Edgbaston, with its booze-fuelled chanting, is the nearest thing English cricket has to a soccer crowd.

The Australians are right to poke fun at the idea that it is intimidating – no player is going to be subject to a hail of bottles like John Snow at the SCG in 1970-71, or endure the abuse the MCG’s notorious Bay 13 use to dish out.

But it is a vibrant venue with an energy that this England team, Broad especially, appear to feed off.

Lord’s, however, has more of a garden party ambience. At any moment, but especially after lunch and tea, swathes of seats lie empty as corporates tuck in, or old friends meet up in the open spaces behind both ends.

It is not for a lack of grog. Lord’s is the only Test ground in England that allows BYO, a bottle of wine/fizz, or four tinnies. But there is no Barmy Army trumpeter to lead the drunken chorus, the MCC do not allow it, nor do they like fancy dress.

Add in the sky-high ticket prices, from A$200 upwards, and in the week an equality investigation said English cricket is institutionally racist, sexist and elitist the crowd are white, wealthy and male to an unfortunately obvious degree.

So as Australia drew the sting of England’s attack there was not much support coming from the bleachers to lift the wearying home bowlers.

But, does this matter? England may love playing at Edgbaston but they have lost the last two Ashes Tests there. They used to have a shocking Ashes record at Lord’s – between 1896 and 2009 England beat Australia once in 27 Tests at HQ, in 1934.

That was when slow left-armer Hedley Verity, who was to die in Sicily leading an assault on German lines nine years later, caught them on a “sticky” (an uncovered wicket made wet by overnight rain) and took 14 wickets in a day.

The long-awaited 2009 success was backed up in 2013, though Australia won by 405 runs in 2015 when Steve Smith made 215 and Chris Rogers 173, and 2019 was a draw.

Playing at Lord’s does inspire opponents, but in the last 20 years, stripping out Tests against Ireland, Bangladesh and Zimbabwe (all of which were won by large margins), England’s win-loss record is 14-9.

Against the same opposition at Edgbaston they are marginally better at 10-4 but the home banker is Old Trafford with a 11-1 record – except the solitary loss was to Australia in 2019, Smith making 211.

Only in Nottingham are England undefeated against Australia in the last two decades – but that’s no consolation for Ben Stokes as Trent Bridge isn’t on the roster this year.

But in the end it doesn’t matter whether the fans are quaffing champagne behind the Lord’s pavilion in the Harris Garden or roaring the team on wearing a Super Mario outfit in the Hollies, it comes down to what the players do with bat and ball, and at present, England’s aren’t doing enough.