“It’s 2022—It’s Pretty Hard to Put Yourself in a Box”

Growing Up, Coming Out is a series of personal reflections from queer American designers, released every day this month.

When I was a child, I would sign my letters as “Hank”—I didn’t want to be a girl—and my parents made so much fun of me and criticized me so much that I never talked about it again. Sometimes your childhood doesn’t allow you to develop into what you think is your true self, you know?

I knew that I liked girls, but I didn’t talk about it—I just went off on my own after high school. I’ve dated men; I’ve dated women; I’ve dated trans women; I’ve dated non-binary people. It’s more of a fluid situation for me. When I came from LA to New York in my early 20s, I was able to vocalize it more—it felt safer.

Obviously I’m way more part of the [LGBTQ+] community than I am of a hetero-cis-normative community. Pretty much everyone who works with me is queer, but I would say a lot of people are fluid. It’s 2022—it’s pretty hard to put yourself in a box of “this is my letter.” It’s always changing now, in this really beautiful way that it feels less contrived and less like having to be pigeonholed.