Miss Manners: What should I do when a visitor falls asleep in my living room?

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I often have adult visitors of various ages stay at my house. Sometimes in the afternoon, while watching television or when everyone is sitting around talking, someone will unintentionally fall asleep.

I take it as a compliment that they are able to relax in my presence. But if I needed to wake the person up, how would I kindly do so? Or when the person wakes up and seems embarrassed, how do I reassure them that it’s OK that they were resting?

Lastly, how should I handle the situation if I ever fall asleep without meaning to, whether as a host or a guest?

GENTLE READER: The best way to demonstrate that it is not a problem is to take little or no notice: Engage the person when awake, overlook any discomfort demonstrated, and quietly remove any items — such as empty glasses — that appear to be in danger.

As a guest, you may expect the same courtesy from your host. If you fall asleep at your own party, it may be worth apologizing — particularly if you wake to find the guests gone, the lights off and the dishes put away (in which case, the apology will require a call or note).