Moving beyond financial survival for the single parent

Single parents face unique financial challenges and money management issues that can impact their ability to provide for themselves and their children.

Some top issues single parents often face include:

—Limited income: Less income makes it difficult to cover basic expenses like housing, food and childcare. Get creative and resourceful and find ways to increase income or reduce expenses.

—Childcare costs: Finding reliable providers and paying for this significant expense can be challenging. Explore alternative childcare options, such as sharing childcare responsibilities with other parents or family members.

—Medical expenses: Covering a child’s medical expenses can be costly. See if you qualify for Medi-Cal to help cover expenses.

—Debt: Limited income and higher expenses often amount to debt. Prioritize paying down debt and develop a plan to manage debt effectively.

—Lack of financial support: Without the financial support of a partner, it can be more difficult to plan for the future. Consider seeking financial support from family, friends or community resources.

—Lack of time: With limited time to manage kids and the budget, develop an efficiency plan such as setting up automatic bill payments or using budgeting apps to track expenses.

Single parents face a host of issues when it comes to money management. They most often need to be proactive and creative in finding ways to manage their finances effectively, such as seeking out resources and support from community organizations, creating a budget and developing a long-term financial plan.

Managing these issues not only impacts the lifestyle of the single parent, but it also carries a heavy weight emotionally. In order to cope with the stress that accompanies this, people affected will create stories that help them deal with the situation, such as, “This is my life, so I just need to get used to it,” or “I have been dealt a poor hand and that’s just the way it is.”

Such stories most often hold single parents – as well as any other human being – back. Certainly, derailing circumstances such as divorce and related situations have a negative impact not only on one’s immediate finances. However, the future belongs to those who can envision a different future and work toward it in the right way and with the right help.

Through his well-established Intentional Change Theory, organizational theorist Richard Boyatzis offers five steps, when used together, that can help lead to successful change:

— the ideal self (where you would like to be)

— the real self (where you are now)

— a learning agenda and/or plan to determine how you move from real self to ideal self

— experiment with the new behaviors, thoughts and actions (practice helps to refine and integrate)

— supportive relationships that allow the person undertaking change to experience and process their discoveries during the change journey

Most people quickly touch base on the real self and then jump straight to the plan with a cloudy vision of the ideal self (where they want to be). Why?

When someone such as a single parent is in a relatively long-term situation that places them in a vulnerable financial and lifestyle state, it’s difficult for them to think or vision beyond.

In other words, it’s tough to think about a desired future with any great detail or belief when one is struggling. And this is the very thing that needs great attention before developing a plan. If the vision is not something that is crystal clear and exciting to the single parent, the motivation for working on the plan will grow weak in challenging moments.

The other step most people gloss over is Number 5 – supportive relationships for the journey. The single parent should take every advantage of their team in this regard, including a trusted financial planner, an estate attorney (yes, even those who feel they don’t have anything to leave need a trust), a CPA and perhaps a coach, if you need someone to serve as an accountability partner and support in the master journey through the five steps.

There are many who seek help from these professionals and after a while, cease to touch base. This is a pity and a waste. It is proven that a good support system makes all the difference, and this step must be heeded seriously. Moreover, when you have a challenge in creating a clear vision, the team can help.

It is said that no one achieves success by doing it alone. If you are a single parent, or if you know one, review the five steps above, take good time and thought in developing your plan and reach out to get a team around you. You deserve it.

Patti Cotton serves as a thought partner to CEOs and their teams to help manage complexity and change. Reach her via email at [email protected].