Oscar noms arrive Tuesday. Who’s in?

I’m dipping into a little Croz — “Carry Me” seems appropriate right about now — but I have to crank the volume because those damn parrots outside my window are raising holy hell. Maybe a doughnut or three would take my mind off the noise … and the fleeting nature of human existence.

I’m Glenn Whipp, columnist for the Los Angeles Times, host of The Envelope’s Friday newsletter. Oscar nominations arrive Tuesday at the crack of dawn. Who’s bringing the donuts for breakfast? And coffee. I’m going to need an IV drip this year.

Predictions for all 23 Oscar categories

As mentioned, Oscar nominations arrive bright and early Tuesday morning and, judging from the conversations I’ve had with film academy members, there are going to be a lot of surprises when the slate is revealed. There’s no best picture front-runner, and loyalties are splintered in a dozen different directions. Someone even put “Don’t Worry Darling” at the top of their ballot. Welcome to the Victory Project? Probably not, but points for originality!

One producer voter told me he had trouble finding 10 movies to pick on his best picture ballot, a reflection either on his lack of enthusiasm for this year’s field or perhaps the fact that he has watched “Top Gun: Maverick” 13 times and didn’t bother with other contenders. Another told me she could have put any one of 20 movies on her best picture ballot — and any one of five in the top slot. “No sequels, though,” she sniffed. “The Oscars should be about original ideas.”

Of course, the Oscars should be a lot of things — recognizing excellence in every field of filmmaking, glitz and glamour, remaining in your seat even after a comedian insults your wife with a lame joke — but they usually fall short. I took that into account when putting together these nominations predictions for all 23 categories to be announced Jan. 24. And you should certainly remember it before you let anything the academy does enrage you. Forget it, Jake. It’s the Oscars.

Can you vote for the Oscar nominees if all you’ve seen is “Top Gun: Maverick”?

(Paramount Pictures/Paramount Pictures)

BAFTA goes bananas for ‘All Quiet’

The British Film Academy has its own set of awards and I broke out my Biro and wrote them all down, taking careful note of the wave of enthusiasm for Edward Berger’s adaptation of “All Quiet on the Western Front.” Will BAFTA’s American counterparts follow suit? Did I mention I predicted all 23 categories? I did? Then why are you still asking that question?

Felix Kammerer in “All Quiet on the Western Front.”

(Reiner Bajo)

Three Amigos Oscar reunion?

Guillermo del Toro will most certainly be at the Oscars this year for his inventive adaptation of “Pinocchio.” Alejandro G. Iñárritu might be there too, repping his drama “Bardo, False Chronicle of a Handful of Truths.” And their longtime friend, Oscar-winning filmmaker Alfonso Cuarón, could well join them if the 37-minute live-action short he produced, “Le Pupille,” earns a nomination. (Which you know it probably will … because you read my predictions already.)

Cuarón spoke with Times staff writer Sergio Burstein about “Le Pupille,” which follows the Christmastime goings-on at a strict religious girls’ boarding school in the 1940s. (It’s streaming on Disney+.)

“Ultimately, it is a story about rebellion, about disobedience, and in that sense, it is close to Guillermo [del Toro’s] ‘Pinocchio,’” Cuarón told Sergio. “But it is also a story about how our actions have unintended consequences.”

Filmmaker Alfonso Cuarón could return to the Oscars with “Le Pupille.”

(Jay L. Clendenin / Los Angeles Times)