Seeing married people’s lives, I didn’t want to get married: Kshama Bindu

All set to marry herself in what will be India’s first instance of sologamy, Kshama Bindu from Gujarat wasn’t expecting to go viral when she planned her simple and close-knit wedding.

The 24-year-old shares, “I have sent online invites to my friends, and I’m almost done with the wedding shopping. Due to the hype in media, I lost the temple wedding venue, so I had to find a new place, which I won’t be revealing.” Bindu, who identifies as a bigender, plans to don a dhoti and kurta set for her mehendi ceremony and a traditional red chaniya choli for her June 11 wedding to balance the ratio.

In a world romanticizing self-love, Bindhu learnt to love herself the hard way. “Growing up, I saw the gender biases that existed in our society and that’s how it started building up in me. I would look at married people around me, how they’re living their life and I never felt like getting married,” reveals the digital content creator, adding, “I have learned from other women that there was a need for self-love. I’d get upset when I’d see and hear about domestic violence and molestation cases around me, and also in relationships. I would ask them, ‘Why are you letting this happen to you? Why can’t you take a stand and love yourself?’ And that triggered me to speak about myself and make them speak for themselves.”

Bindu finds it weird that not many men have taken to sologamy. When asked if she believes people choose sologamy to escape the pressure to settle down, she shares, “It could be one of the reasons, but we need to know why they are avoiding marriage. It means they want to remain single. So let them be; sologamy is for that.”

So, does this mean she isn’t open to committing to anyone in the future with sologamy? “I don’t make such commitments as I have not seen the future. But I will always do whatever makes me happy. If at some point I feel like this is what is not making me happy, but this is what is. I will choose it over everything.”