A part of parenting is controlling the fight and aggression between the kids. Often, the kids grow up fighting with each other, arguing and not liking the company of their siblings. This often involves aggression and fighting, leading to more rivalry. However, it is important to know what we, as a parent, can do in such situations. More than ever, it is important to not involve ourselves in their fights and take sides. Being a parent can be tricky. On one hand, we want them to gel with each other, and on the other, it can break our hearts to see them fight. So, what should we do to handle sibling aggression? How do we address it?
Dr. Jazmine McCoy, Psychologist, addressed the issue of how to behave in times of sibling rivalry in her recent post. Jazmine, who goes by the name The Mom Psychologist on Instagram, is famous for sharing parenting-related tips and tricks on her social media profile on a regular basis. A day back, Jazmine shared an explanatory video featuring herself on Instagram and noted down four things that we should keep in mind at all times when we see our kids fight:
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Stay calm: It is important to keep our head calm in such situations when we watch our kids fight. It is also important to keep reminding ourselves that there is no good/bad in the situation. It just involves two kids who are having a difficult time.
Re-establish safety: Sibling aggression often comes from the fact that they do not feel safe. At such times, it is important to establish safety by being in between the kids and assuring them that bodies are not for hurting.
Observe and narrate: Jazmine recommended that parents should observe their kids and try to assess the situation in a non-judgmental way. This will allow them to have a neutral approach to the situation and later narrate the same to the kids.
Help the older child solve: Once the situation is in control, the parent can help the older child identify and validate the problem. They should also help the older child to find words in order to communicate their needs to the younger sibling. The younger sibling should be guided to honour their needs and see things from the sibling’s perspective.
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