Logan Brown: ‘I’m a pregnant trans man and I do exist. No matter what anyone says, I am literally living proof’

Were there any support mechanisms in place for gender dysphoria during labour?

I think any time I go somewhere, it’s always very awkward at first and it can get my back up. But, because they were expecting us and had been told that there was a trans person coming, they knew I had to give them feedback, so they really wanted to make sure I was supported. A doctor even brought a gift for us, which was lovely.

There was one midwife in particular who knew everything about trans-specific things and that was great; she’s visiting us again today. There was nothing put in place to check in on my mental health as a trans man, but I felt people did go out of their way to check in and understand the situation. We had some really good conversations.

When I was in labour – and there was so much attention being paid to what was going on down there – it did get to the point where I burst out crying and I said, “I need a C-section,” as it was too overwhelming and dysphoric. But, it was also at that stage they needed to do an emergency C-section anyway. I was kind of glad, in the end, that I wasn’t giving birth naturally; I don’t know how I would have coped if I had a natural birth.

I actually asked for a C-section at the beginning, but the more I connected with my body, the more I did want to give it a go [giving birth naturally]. If it were to happen again, though, I think putting a plan in place to have a C-section would make me a lot more comfortable and confident.

Did you feel supported?

Obviously, the actual labour experience was challenging but while I was there, I did feel supported. Some of the midwives were bringing me information sheets and scribbling out the word ‘woman’ and putting ‘person’ instead, which was nice.

How does it feel to be a parent?

I feel like I’ve only just got out of a dream that I’ve been in the past few days… I just look at her and think, ‘Wow, you are really precious.’ I thought I was so organised, but nothing could fully prepare me for it all. Some of it, I expected to be hard, but what a massive achievement; we’re really, really lucky.

Bailey and I can get really overwhelmed, and sometimes, because of our ADHD and autism, we struggle even to leave the house – but if anything, Nova now gives us a reason to do things. It’s stressful, but also, the need for us to be able to care for someone is amazing; it’s a responsibility.

In My Daddy’s Belly (The Miracle of Male Birth) by Logan Brown is available to pre-order now, 12.99.

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